Weekly Horoscope
Sunday, May 15, 2005
All Signs
From May 13-16 (especially Sunday May 15) we have to fasten our seatbelts. Fiery Mars, Lord of war and ruler of aggression (and our muscles) lines up with unstable, explosive Uranus. Like wow! No other planetary combination more strongly portends sudden upsets, accidents, rash behavior, and surprising incidents. Expect power outages, computer crashes, explosions, accidents with fire, electricity, metal objects and sharp instruments. Verbal accidents happen too. Therefore, due to circumstances within my control, tomorrow will be cancelled. It appears the shortest distance between two points is under construction.
Aries (March 21-April 19)
It's important to be kind to yourself. Be soft and gentle with your needs and wants. At this moment, you're restless, impatient and emotionally fidgety. It's as if you know you're supposed to do something but you're not sure what it is. Or worse: you know you're supposed to do something and you don't want to do it! You've tried every tactical delay in the book. Unconscious, habitual behavior patterns from the past now erupt -- creating a bad impression on everyone.(Wince.) But this isn't really you! It's your ' other side'. Relax. It disappears soon. Until then, can you hum a few bars of "Me and My Shadow?"
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
By nature, you're not impulsive. You weigh your decisions carefully. You think things through. You're the advocate of the proverbial, sober, second thought. Nevertheless, we are all far more than our "sign." Therefore, expect wild and wacky things to happen with friends. For starters, your relationships with groups could suddenly explode. You might have a falling out with someone. Or you might suddenly lead a revolution! You're either rebelling from a group or the dictates of a friend, or you're urging others to do so! You're not to be anyone's patsy. No one's going to walk all over you. No way!
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
You're unusually ambitious right now. And you're no fool. (Either one of you.) Nevertheless, something so disrupts your life that not only do you feel mutinous about a situation, it's the last straw! Yup - that Peter Finch moment from Network: "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore!" Although it's not easy to practice patience, try not to fly off the handle. You might act so brashly, especially with a boss, parent or authority figure -- you'll regret it. What's the up side of that? Count to 11 before you reply to others. If you're going to change your job or your career direction, make sure the decision is a rational choice and not just an emotional reaction.
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Sudden opportunities to travel or expand your education by taking a course or special training might fall in your lap. Clunk! If so, your window of opportunity is brief. You'll have to make a fast decision. However, something to guard against right now is a tendency to proselytize or convince others about your political and religious views. I hate to tell you -- but no one really cares. You're the one who has your belly in a rash about something. If you wait a few days, you'll be surprised how differently you'll feel about it all. Chill out. Talk to friends and groups. Get their feedback about stuff. Be careful traveling. Drive defensively. This is an accident-prone time.
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)
You feel unusually bold and passionate. (This is the stuff of bodice rippers.) You're ready to throw caution to the winds. You'll give up everything for "love!" (You invented high drama, especially with a little lust thrown in.) But what and whom are you rebelling against? You want to strike a blow for your own freedom -- your own values. You're running around singing "My Way." Meanwhile, sudden upsets to your partner's income, and matters connected with insurance, taxes, debt and shared property might create a few surprises. You will have to deal with this stuff whether you like it or not. Remember: your first loss is your cheapest loss. Just do it.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
Tension, unexpected situations, and explosive arguments with partners or close friends are highly likely. You have to ask yourself what the point of any blowup is, no matter how angry you are. The temporary satisfaction of getting something off your chest generally does not outweigh the disadvantage of having to live with your words for the rest of your life. People will remember what you say! Later, when you calm down, you might regret it. To remain in a position of respect, and to keep your good name with your friends, think twice before sounding off to someone. Angry words only make everyone miserable. That is their only function. Plus, why give everyone something to talk about? Be cool.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
Be careful about accidents related to your job. Although you can't control computer breakdowns, power outages and technological quirks. (Ouch.) You can however, control your impulse to walk off the job, or tell your boss what you really think. Consider this: you are happiest when you have harmony in your life and in your surroundings. Therefore, think carefully before you upset any apple carts. (This goes for PCs as well.) If you're going to create a tempest in a teapot, make it your choice -- furthermore a choice that is wise and inevitable. You don't want it to be just a crazy scene exploding. This won't make you happy. Avoid people who upset you. Take a mental health day, if necessary.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
Parents must be extra vigilant with children at this time. This is a hugely accident-prone time for your kids. Your own behavior with them might even be impulsive, erratic and confusing. (Not good.) Just remember that when in doubt -- nothing works like a good hug. And nothing shuts others up faster than agreeing with them. It's wise to know when to hold and when to fold. This advice applies to romantic upsets as well. Put a lid on it right now. The good news is that unexpected flirtations and new love might fly in the window! Yay! If so, lemme tell ya, it will be worthy of some juicy diary entries. The object of your affection is someone you'd normally never connect with. ("Hmmm - this is different, but tasty!")
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
Guard against accidents in the home, especially accidents related to fire, electricity, tools, glass, and sharp, metal objects. Don't be hasty when you're doing things. Similarly, don't be too quick in replying to family members. Take your time in all your activities, most especially those related to home, family and real estate. Verbal and literal accidents can be avoided by slowing down and being more careful. Think before you speak. Remember the carpenter's rule: measure twice, cut once. Domestic tensions will flare up. You'll want to tell someone to take a hike. Lighten up. (Not everyone has a photographic memory -- some don't even have film!)
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
Please, please, be extra careful driving, jogging and walking. This is a very accident-prone time for you. Drive defensively. Crazy situations out of the blue can suddenly occur, and it's not even your fault. Or you might be suddenly distracted and overlook something (like staying on the road.) Verbal accidents are also likely. A quick, thoughtless retort could land you in hot water. Since you're not a teabag, why even go there? Avoid arguments with siblings and relatives. There is an up side however; you're full of bright, way-out ideas! Your genius IQ keeps pumping out groundbreaking concepts. Even I'm amazed at how brilliant you are!
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
Keep an eye on your money, your wallet, and your possessions at this time. You can suddenly lose money; and fortunately, you can suddenly find it or make it. (Those new copy machines are fabulous!) Alternatively, you might have an opportunity for a new job; or you might suddenly quit the job you already have. Everything to do with finances and your earnings are subject to quick upsets and changes. This might simply be due to sudden, impulse purchases. (Of course, everyone needs surround sound.) Just make sure you know what you're doing before you part with your hard-earned cash. You're trying to assert your freedom through your possessions and how you spend your money. But you are the one who will get your Visa bill. Oh yes.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)
The conjunction of fiery Mars and explosive Uranus (see All Signs above) occurs in your sign. Need I say more? (Give up your search for reality; just settle for a good fantasy.) You're restless, irritable, edgy, nervous and rebellious! You insist on asserting your freedom. You want your own way. Your relations with partners and authority figures are tenuous at best. (Quit flipping the bird.) Whatever you do, you're a bit rash and impulsive. Since this is just a temporary influence -- cool your jets! It'll pass in a day or two. Until then, don't do or say things that angers everyone including yourself. You can't win with this approach. Actually, this is a fabulous opportunity to demonstrate grace under pressure. Think of it as a workout for enlightenment.
